At what price?

cropped-Jesus-began-to-weep.jpgIn the familiar story of Lazarus being raised from the dead, I hear the sorrows of two women weeping for the loss of their brother. I feel the compassionate Jesus witnessing their grief. And I wonder: at what price did Jesus heal Lazarus in the final days of his life?

Because the story tells me Jesus did not go immediately to the sisters when he first heard of their brother’s illness.  He paused.  Not even when he first spoke with Martha did he go to their dying brother.

It was when Mary and her friends came to him in tears of desperate sorrows that his own “greatly disturbed” spirit was “deeply moved”; that he too wept and began asking the questions of how to help – just like a friend would.

When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who came with her also weeping, he was greatly disturbed in spirit and deeply moved. He said, Where have you laid him? They said to him, “Lord, come and see.” Jesus began to weep.– John 11:33-35 

So I have to wonder, did seeing the tears of those he loved outweigh any hesitation he may have had to heal?  And provoke him to heal even as he knew this to be the final public act that would heighten and hasten the charges levied against him, and to his death?

Because this is what happened after Lazarus was raised to life.  After the rotting, decaying, bindings of death were removed and Lazarus returned to his family in whole (I can not even imagine what that must have been like for Martha and Mary); while the celebrations of a beloved brother returned to his family continued, people began planning to put him to death.  And Jesus withdrew from public life.

So from that day on they planned to put him to death. Jesus therefore no longer walked about openly among the Jews, but went from there to a town called Ephraim in the region near the wilderness; and he remained there with the disciples.-John 11:53-54

Seeing Jesus being greatly disturbed, moved, weeping; wondering if he knew the sacrifice being made in healing and by this, walking closer to the time of his own death and ultimate sacrifice for us, brings me closer to him as both The Son of Man and The Son of God.  And sometimes this makes me weep.

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